Chug!

Oh bravo, humanity— you’ve finally created the ultimate nanny in sticker form: here to guilt-trip you into drinking water like a frat bro peer-pressuring you at a party, because apparently we’re all toddlers who need a cartoon liquid blob screaming at us to stay alive.

This smug little droplet waddles around with tiny legs, beaming with the unearned confidence of something that’s literally 99% water weight. Those sparkling eyes? Pure judgment. That psychotic grin? The smile of a hall monitor who lives to catch you slacking while saying  “I know you’ve been dehydrated since Tuesday.” And just in case you somehow missed the point, it’s surrounded by its own personal chant squad yelling “CHUG!” three times—like one passive-aggressive reminder wasn’t condescending enough.

• Triple “CHUG!” ensures maximum hydration harassment so you’ll never forget you’re failing at basic biology
• ~2 inches of concentrated peer pressure
• Sparkly eyes track your every dehydrated move and follow you until you comply
• Proven to make you reach for water out of spite or hide your bottle in shame
• Waterproof (obviously) and scratch-resistant, because dehydration doesn’t quit
• Premium vinyl that stays more hydrated than you’ll ever be

It’s a tiny, adorable tyrant enforcing the 8-glasses-a-day rule with relentless enthusiasm. Perfect for your neglected water bottle (so it can mock you directly), your laptop (to trigger your dehydrated coworkers), or your bathroom mirror (for that special “you’re disappointing your organs” vibe). It’s not hydration motivation—it’s emotional blackmail with free shipping.

May cause involuntary gulping, sudden bathroom breaks, or the urge to whisper “fine, Mom” every time you see it. Known side effects include proper hydration, better kidney function, and deep-seated resentment. Drink responsibly—or else.