Overstimulated

Congratulations, your ears have filed for divorce from the rest of society. One more leaf-blower, throat-clearing coworker, or TikTok at full volume, and you’re legally allowed to commit crimes.

• Approximately 2 inches - bigger than your remaining patience, smaller than your growing hit list
• Patron saint of noise cancelling headphones and people who choose arson over gum smacking 
• Premium waterproof vinyl - survives tantrums, death glares, and being hurled at loud neighbors 
• Industrial strength - sticks harder than the sound of Velcro in a library(you know the one)

Slap it on your headphones, laptop, water bottle, or directly on your face when speech is no longer an option. You’re not sensitive. The world is just loud, crunchy, and begging for a muzzle.

Warning: Not actual legal advice, proceed with caution.